It has been EXACTLY one month since the Campbell sickness started. We have been married for nearly a year and a half, and have had little colds or not felt great, but this past month we got slammed with sickness.
Starting with the Wednesday, before Christmas with my strep and some other strange virus that lasted throughout our stay at home; to just last weekend Monroe's horrible bout with the flu. Poor guy was so sick! He went to the doctor on Friday, and was diagnosed with the flu; I have honestly never seen someone so sick; he couldn't even change the channel on the TV. We spent our entire long weekend trying to get his fever below 102, and to make him comfortable. One thing he did have was a MAJOR appetite, which is strange for many reasons...for those of you that really know Monroe, he is not a big eater and secondly, WHO HAS A HUGE APPETITE WITH THE FLU?!? I spent the weekend making homemade chicken noodle soup, his favorite beer bread, running to Chick-fil-A, and other random places for strange cravings he was having. There were many funny stories that came out of this weekend, and I am so glad that we can laugh at them now that he is healthy.
One thing I have been hesitant to blog about, let alone even talk about is what happened to our little family the week we returned after Christmas break. However, I have found the more I talk about it, the better I feel and the more prayer and support we receive. We are not yet trying to start a family, and I must have only been about 3 weeks along. It all happened in one day, I found out I was pregnant in the morning and had lost the baby that afternoon. The doctor said that most people wouldn't have even known they were pregnant; and that it is a blessing and curse with those early detection pregnancy tests. I just knew something was up with my body and that's why I tested. The highs and lows of emotion all in one day was a lot to handle. It was amazing to us the grief and loss that we felt. We find peace in knowing that it is all in God's timing, and that when the time is right we will hopefully be blessed with a healthy child. At first I was so ashamed that my body wasn't able to carry that precious child, but when I conceived I had had a steroid shot and was on heavy antibiotics, my body was really sick. Monroe and I are so blessed to have the support that we have, both in prayer and in friendship. Sometimes I feel silly being so upset, because I know people have lost babies much farther into their pregnancy, even almost at full term. How could we be so devastated after only knowing for a few hours? But their was a little life in me, not yet even visible to the naked eye, not yet a heartbeat, but their was life, a little precious child. I realized I needed to stop validating my feelings, they were totally normal.
My prayer is that this will help someone who is going through or has gone through the same thing. It is still pretty fresh, and I still have moments where I just want to sob, but I know ultimately the Lord is in control, and that provides a comfort like nothing else.
This past month we have really lived out those vows we said on our wedding day, almost a year and a half ago. Our love has grown stronger as we have taken care of each other and supported each other through all this. I know that with Monroe at my side, anything is possible. We are so lucky to have the love that we have, and that it only continues to mature and to deepen.